This, Too, Shall Pass

In the interest of recording Fred’s greatness for all time I thought I would put together a list of the various things which have passed through him. Fred is gifted with the unique ability to consume virtually any object and turn it directly into an awful and unique odor.

The following is a evidence of both his greatness as a dog and my lack of greatness as a dog owner.

  • Wooden spoons – shortly after we got him he ate all of our wooden spoons. One of them was covered with chili powder.
  • A whole bag of Reeses Peanut Peanut butter cups wrappers and all – His first Halloween was an eventful one
  • My Jade Plant – It used to be huge, now very little is left.
  • Chicken bones. He was just too quick. He swallowed them whole to avoid that whole jagged edge problem.
  • A bag of flour. (He ate the baby!)
  • Squash from my garden.
  • Corn on the cob. Both corn and cob.
  • Tomatoes from my garden.
  • Iams Large Breed Dog Food. Have you tried that stuff? It’s gross.
  • A whole bag of potato chips in under 10 seconds.
  • A whole bunch of bananas. (there have been multiple banana dissappearances)
  • A loaf of bread.
  • Two loaves of bread
  • Fred really loves bread
  • Several bags of Halloween candy. No, we didn’t learn our lesson the first time.
  • Cat poop. Yeah. Cat poop.
  • Lawn fertilizer. The iron in it turned his poop black.
  • Bone from a pork chop. It was T shaped and about 9 inches long so I though he’d just take the meat off of it. Then he swallowed it whole.
  • Raw potatoes. Luckily he didn’t find those in my garden.
  • Cat vomit. (Usually a good source of vegetation)
  • Hostas, in the spring when they’re delicious.
  • Leftover grains from my beer making.

That is all I can think of at the moment. Please feel free to add to the list if you remember something that is not on my list.

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